Thursday, March 03, 2005

American Idolatry and Inane Ramblings

I admit it....I watch American Idol. It all begins with the oh-too-tempting "These are the losers" shows, and it just balloons from there. American Idol is really just an exercise in cruelty. These poor shmucks are paraded in front of the nation and then bashed by a panel of has-been or never-were judges. We're watching torture!!! Or maybe they're just trying to torture those of us watching at home (did we all see Constantine's rendition of "Kiss from a Rose?").

There also seems to be quite a bit more sexual harrassment occuring this (almost said semester) season. First Simon wanted to be the Latin chick's microphone, and last night Paula got sloppy after the dark man with the glasses did his rendition of "Let's Get it On." Hornballs.

The one Dallasite went home tonight, and I can't say that it was a bad decision to send her packing. Celena Rae (Ray?) sounded strained with every note during her last performance. Bye-bye Celena....even though you look like Martina McBride.

Bo Bice...make me proud, brother!!

**********End of American Idol Post***************

In other news, I went to my daytime book discussion group today (Books Sandwiched In...we bring our lunch). Joe and Hazel (80-year-olds) weren't there, but Sammy (my cousin the retired postman), Nancy (40'ish-never-married-YMCA-morning-worker), and Carol (slightly-stuffy-intelligent-well-traveled-older-local-newspaper-writer) showed up. It seems to be the pattern that I've just finished some oddly titled book whenever I go to "report" at these meetings. Today I discussed The Sex Lives of Cannibals, and I actually coaxed a guffaw out of Carol. I think that's gonna be the highlight of my week. As I recall it was the diapers on the reef that really threw her over the edge. I freakin' love this book. You all have to go get it. It'll be a napkin by the time I mail it to all of you blog readers.

I've been swearing off library books until I whittle down my own stacks, but at Valerie's recommendation I picked up Bet Me, by Jennifer Crusie, today. I don't know what's going on with me and this chick lit/romancey jag. Sooooo very unlike me. I'm slightly terrified by the image of high heels and cherries on the cover of this one (that's just too much!), but I'm trusting you, Val.

Jennifer Weiner is still a goddess. I spent the better part of my evening reading her blog entries from as far back as 2002. I'm determined to work my way through her blog in its entirity 1) because it's educational if you're a wanna-be writer 2) it's fookin' hilarious. Her dog's name is Wendell. What's not to LOVE!! *Note: Dash (our one-eyed weenie dog) got himself buried so thoroughly under a blanket tonight that all you could see was the black tippy tip of his nose. There are pictures coming.

I don't have anything more intelligent than this in me tonight. Sorry my lovelies. Maybe the porn post will come tomorrow (no pun intended). And it appears that I'm bound and determined to push parentheses to the apex of their possibilities. And my collar bones are protruding nicely due to the aforementioned diet/exercise regime. It's all about the small pleasures in life.

On TV: Nothing! I turned the mofo off!
MP3: Bruce Hornsby....That's Just the Way It Is
Reading: The Beauty Myth....didn't make much of a dent today
In my head: gray matter...I assume


  1. Andi! Well, I really do hope that you like the book. The picture really doesn't depict the entire book. You'll know why they are there after you start reading. I know that you are not a girly reader, but she writes alot like Weiner in Good In Bed. I like the fact that they both don't have a twig for the main character. It's nice to read a book about a curvy woman with a sexual side! No matter what shape you are I think it is nice for books to be about average women. Anywhoo as you can tell I'm with you on the floofy mags. Never read Bust, I stick to Parents it has good home makeovers and cheap ways to up date your look, and stuff about the kiddies. Good for you on the working out thing, I have also shed about 10 lbs., I walk 2 miles and pull the wagon with the girlies in tow. Loves ya, and really hope you like the book since you wrote about me! If not I may have to change my name to my maiden!

  2. Pop Idol/American Idol/the X-factor, they're all only good as long as it is the early stages.

    At first I used to feel kinda guilty laughing at those people who were so bad, yet convinced that they were "the next big thing"

    At this stage I just laugh, they've had years of watching other people being crap, and not learning from it. Now I just wonder who told these out-of-tune croakers they could sing? It couldn't have been their friends could it?

  3. Val,
    I started reading the book last night after my post, and I almost snorted twice in 4 pages. Pretty darn good! I'll recap some of my fave quotes later. Thanks for the rec because I think I just might like this one.

    Good for you on the workin' out thing, too! It sounds like it'd be unbearably hot walking two miles, pulling your children in Nevada, though. Yay or nay? I'm a total wussy-butt when it comes to hot weather. I'm happiest on a misty, cloudy day. lol

    Loves ya, too! And don't change your name...the one you have is lurvely! lol

  4. Fence, I'm with ya! I used to feel guilty about laughing at them, too, but now I just go with it. Like you, I don't know WHO could've possibly told them they're good. I'm thinkin' their mamas and grandmothers. Mamas and grandmothers are always kind no matter how sucky you are. lol

  5. Hey there! Well, I just wanted to throw in my two cents about how seriously I hate and despise American Idol. I never watch it. Voyeuristic crap, thank you very much! :) Anyway, I know you agree, you just happen to also watch it. I'm just saying...
    Also, congrats on the weight loss you AND Val! I, on the other hand, have gained eight pounds, which is not too bad considering that I'm four months into this weightfest we call pregnancy. I find out the sex on the thirtieth. I'll keep ya posted!

  6. Wooo! I can't wait to find out if I'm an aunt or an uncle (Friends flashback). Hey, are you still reading chick lit? You need to read Little Earthquakes, by Jennifer Weiner. Just do it.


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