Thursday, May 05, 2005

Wakeup Call....

It's all still here, it's just too much to see and read over every time I blog. To read the post highlight the white space with your cursor.

This morning I found out that one of my closest friends has cancer. Crystal is 24, she's a teacher, she's gorgeous and sweet. She was having some problems with her eye...some redness and blurred vision. She thought it was Pink Eye, but it turned out to be a tumor nestled between her brain and her optic nerve. The week after she found out she went to a neurosurgeon and he removed all that he could. She lost sight in her right eye. She says she can live with that...it's better than the alternative. She hasn't worked her normal teaching job since the beginning of April, but she's subbing to ease back into work. She goes back to the doctor in July to find out if what's left of the tumor is growing again and if she'll need chemo or radiation. I saw her in March, and all of this happened in April.

We met during the summer between our Junior and Senior years of college. There are three of us....Amanda, Crystal, and me. They're the only people I went to college with that I get together with on a regular basis. They're wonderful, funny, sweet, talented. I've posted about them before. I admire them greatly. We don't get to see each other as often as we'd like. Crystal teaches full time in a high school and middle school and works with kids in lots of academic extracurriculars. She's dating a guy we went to college with named Terry. Crystal wants to go to law school. Amanda teaches high school Spanish, coaches the dance team, and teaches dance classes at a studio. She's also a clogger in her free time (how she has any, I don't know).
Sometimes we go a month or so without talking because we're busy, and we're spread out an hour apart in each direction. We never thought so much could happen in a month. She didn't tell us until now because it was a blur and because she didn't want to burden us. That's just the way she is.

This morning I am angry. I'm angry that Crystal is going through this, and I'm upset that we weren't there for her. It's incredibly unfair that someone so innately good should have to deal with this much painful shit. She says she knows God has a plan for her, she just wishes she could see it. I know she's right, but I'm still pissed at Him for putting her through this. I've been crying all morning, walking around in a daze, and thinking of how stupid my problems are. It doesn't really matter how fucked up my jobs are, it doesn't really matter if the phone rings, and anything I say on this blog doesn't matter. What matters is that my friend is struggling and I love her very much. If you pray, pray for her.

14 comments:

  1. That blows, and I'll be praying for her. Praise God that she's keeping her faith.
    I might post about suffering on my blog later if you're interested.

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  2. I'll also enlist the aid of my extensive prayer request list... Mwahahahahaha!

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  3. umm..I dont' know why Cheryl's prayer request list sounds evil to me now...probably because of the laughter....
    I'm so glad that your friend was able to have surgery. you know i'll be praying. let us know how things turn out!

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  4. I'm sorry to hear that Andi. I'll be praying for her as well. Try to hang in there.

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  5. Makes my work with the Cancer Society here in Canada all the more worthwhile.
    I'm sorry Andi. Give her my best.

    -Amy

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  6. Thanks all. I've about got myself under control now. No crying in a couple hours. :o) I'm glad she's doing well and in good spirits, and we have every intention of having a girls' day soon...always good for laughs and further spirit-lifting.

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  7. girls days rule and help SOOOOOOOOO much!!!

    all you can do is offer a shoulder and a laugh. that will be the best thing for her.

    *kisses*

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  8. This is one of those times when you just don't know what to say.








    Nothin'.

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  9. I am so sorry and I hope that she is doing better!

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  10. Ditto to Osbasson's comments.

    My blog-roll seems full of bad news today

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  11. Oh Andi, I'm just like Osbasso. I am so sorry to hear that, but glad to hear she is in such good spirits. She is lucky to have such an awesome friend like you. I will definitely add her (and you) to my prayer list.

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  12. Thanks for all the good thoughts and prayers, everyone. I'm doin' much better today...just still feeling pretty emotionally drained.

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  13. Andi, I don't pray, but I do believe in respite for the good. When someone is ill, all you can do is hope and give them what they need. Sometimes it's just laughing together, or hugs. I'm sorry, I wish I could be more helpful.

    ((((((Andi and friend))))))

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