Friday, July 08, 2005

My ear hurts!!!!

My ear hurts. It hurts way down inside, and it's driving me batty. I hate annoying shit like this. Being the paranoid crazy-ass I am about my orifices, the first thought I had was..."What if someting crawled down in there and died? I've officially watched too effin' many Discovery Health shows about emergency room oddities. This is right up there with the unborn twin I'm quite convinced I have inside me....somewhere. When I get a headache he's gnawing his way out of my head. When I have a sore muscle he's gnawing his way out of my back. You get the picture. Now I obviously have a colony of roaches or spiders or other such nasties sexin' in my ear before dying of an orgasm-induced heart attack.

That's all I need on a Friday when the Normans are comin' to the 'brary. Pray for my soul.

TV: None
CD: Joni Mitchell....Blue
Reading: The Soul of Sex...mostly.
In my head: Nasties.


  1. Star Trek II, wrath of khan.

    scariest ear moment.

    i mean a freakin bug went int there!!!


  2. Get you're head out of your own rear-end and think about the real world for a change!

  3. Thank you for that stunning tip, Klem. You do realize you don't have to read my blog, yes?? Away with you now.

  4. I think your Unborn Twin is trying to gnaw his way out of your ear. That sounds worse than giving birth. I wouldn't know. I had a C-Section.

    It's probably H20 babe.

    Good luck with the Normans!

  5. ugh... is it swimmer's ear? If so get on some meds asap. And it does sound worse than childbirth, Heather. I TORE.....

  6. wow- where the hell did that comment come from??!!!!????

    We luv u Andish :) Im sure its not bugs or anything.... ummmm.... yeah.....

    E was convinced she had something living in her ear last year- went to the Dr and everything was fine.

    Its prolly just all of the swimming you are doing...

  7. What's with the old fart, Klem? Whats the real world to him -- Granny Porn???


    Snippets like that really make me not want to have kiddos!!

  9. ha! I certainly didnt' need to read it! please, for those of us about to experience childbirth for the first time...leave out the details!
    andi- i know a lady who once woke up in a hotel with a bug trying to crawl in her ear. :) just thought THAT would make you feel better. and yes. its a true story. she was an aldersgatian.
    what is this klem moron doing? does he not realize that your blog page is your own little world and we are all choosing to be a part of it? does he want you posting about london horror stories all the time? i come here for a break. not the real world. (plus- do you live in a fake world? because last time i checked your real world involved a hurting ear...)

  10. Andi!

    My freshman roomate at Baylor DID have a bug crawl in her ear and refuse to come out. It was the summer before freshman year.

    She woke up, yelled for her Dad .. he had to pour oil in her ear and get it out with tweezers. She lived in Beeville. Maybe that had something to do with it.

    This is the only bug-in-the-ear story I have. I'm glad to have the chance to share it because it's been scaring me since 1963.

  11. i think i have a tapeworm if that makes you feel any better!

  12. cool got some joni on my playlist i am listening to right now.

    can i just say that Wrath of Khan is like the shit..just watched it AGAIN a couple weeks ago...ended up doing a spock/kirk love post over it. hehe

    dude, i am so like you!!! i always think i am dying. always. i am scared of everything spiders EAR WIGS like why call them that if they aren't really going to crawl in my ear and eat my brians?

    thanks for sharing i feel...i feel like there are spiders crawling in my underwear.

    oh oh oh aint no sunshine whens shes gone..original of course..just came on...hehe

  13. hey andi, you gotta love klem, why would someone leave a comment when ther is no way you to will ever want to meet, theres so much room in cber space there klem, and remember , you clicked on her blogg to begin with, or did the boogy man make you, keep it up Andi, i love the posts.

  14. Heather,
    I think you're right about the twin. He's pissed!

    And, yes, it's swim ear I do believe. I have alcohol in my ear as we speak. And not the tasty berry-flavored kind.

  15. LMAO, Amanda. Looks like you horrified everyone, but I ain't skeered. That's why I plan to purchase a child.

    I do believe it is swim ear. Doesn't alcohol work or do I need to hop up on meds?

  16. Thank you, "items,"

    You all are flattering the poo out of me coming to my aid in the wake of the Klem attack. I heart you all.

  17. Clackerdoodle,
    I refuse to post about London. I don't do politicky. I think it, I peruse it, I digest it, but I don't blog about it. Unless it's a shot at Bush in general. You understand.

  18. Oh sweet Jesus, Suzz. You're killin' me. I had just convinced myself that it isn't an insect.

  19. Thanks, Ago-go!!! I feel much better now. I thought I had a tapeworm earlier in the week, but it was just PMS.

  20. Corinna,
    You crack me up. I'm with you on the earwigs. I was first introduced to earwigs in the lovely writings of Roald Dahl. George's Marvelous Medicine to be exact. I loved that book, but the earwig freaked me right on out.

  21. Wasn't there a Twilight Zone episode where a bug crawled into this guy's ear and ate it's way to the other side and crawled out of the other ear? I was affraid to sleep for a month after I saw that.

  22. That's exactly why I never watched The Twilight Zone!

  23. Phlegmy Klem needs to take a a cliff.

    Anywhore, back to your inner ear ailment: put some windex on it.

  24. Hiya Andi,
    Klem is an idiot.
    And if you have ear problems use vegetable oil before you go to the doc. Trust me, it works in most cases.

    P.S. If it was a bug you would hear the buzzing. Unless it was the bug from wrtah of khan...then you are screwed!!!

  25. Geez, I've gotta watch Wrath of Khan. Well, maybe not until I get this ear thing cleared up.

  26. LMAO, Kikhwa! I watched Greek Wedding a couple of weekends ago. Love it!

  27. You might not need meds. I was stupid and waited for the water to get all INFECTED.

  28. Ooohh. I hope I don't need meds. I hate going to the doc.


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