Monday, August 08, 2005

A Full-Blown Tantrum


FUCK FUCK FUCKKKKK HIGHER EDUCATION!!! You heard me.

I received a loan statement for a loan I didn't know I had for the amount of roughly $27,000. 27,000 DOLLARS! Now, this would not have been shocking had I been made aware of it during my TWO financial aid exit interviews from two INSTITUTIONS OF HIGHER EDUCATION. I left Baylor U....aka, Expensive-Ass Private School...in 2001 to attend Texas A&M University-Branch Near Home for one iota the price. I paid a good deal of my junior and senior years of university out of my own fat pocket because I made a drug-dealer's stash of cash as a web designer for a Fortune 500 company in Dallas. Now defunct...a piece of shit overall, but that's beside the point (giving middle finger salute to TXU Energy and all their Polish outsourced whores).

When I exited Baylor, I was told that all my financial aid info would be passed on to A&M's system, so I could carry on seamlessly with my education, and because my mom made too much money, I didn't qualify for grants. Work study and loans were my ticket to a cheap-ass piece of paper that has thus far gotten me one shitty teaching job that I hated and paid decent and one teaching job I dearly love that is PART TIME, but I love English, and I'm a woman of principle. I'll take beans to do what I love.

Upon my exiting TAMU-Branch Near Home I was given a summary of my debt and I even asked, "Is that it?" When I went to Baylor it was approximately 16,000 dollars a year to attend, and it was looking light on the loan horizon upon exit interviewing. I was assured, "This is all." Well FUCK whoever said that. They were dead ass wrong and deserve to be raped with the handle of a garden tool because I do indeed now owe 27,000 dollars. Holy shit. I'm gonna be eating pork-n-beans out of a can for the next 50 years and I'll never be able to buy a home or retire.

I've always joked about staying in school until I'm 55 so my loans will be forgiven. Right now, that's lookin' like the smart thing to do. Defer til I die.

Let this be a warning to all of the college students out there reading. You are getting fucked, and I'm about to go back to school for another year and a half of fuckage.

I was just telling D. yesterday that I need to curb my cursing. Yeah, well it's not fuckin' happenin' today.

Listening to: The hum of my blood pressure.

48 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry to hear this. Is there any way to get back to those who specifically gave you a different impression? Seems like there should be some sort of accountability involved here. I'd like to say that I've been through this and that it'll work itself out, but I went to school in the days where I paid a whopping $80/month to pay off my loans. And before exit interviews became the thing to do.

    It sounds like you might have to use your design skills and start a porn site. If I was filthy rich, I'd help you out, but..... I hope you get this figured out.

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  2. I plan on staying in school forever, because these loans are just ridiculous! Good luck on it all. Stay in school forever!

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  3. That sucks. Avoid them like the plague. Works for me.

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  4. Os,
    We'll see, but I doubt there's anything to be done about it. Some of my loan payments are $80/month!!! If I want to pay until I shrivel up and expire.

    Amber,
    We'll be lifelong students together. Compadres in scamming the system and becoming smarter at the same time.

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  5. ANDI!!

    OHMIGOSH .. I went to Baylor when it was $20/credit. $16,000 for WHAT???? Is that room and board too? Did you live in a room with gold faucets and a sauna?

    Can't part be counted off because you taught for a year? Isn't there some forgivenss thing? Are you sure the paperwork is right?

    I'm thinking of every bad word I know to cover this. I know a lot of bad words, too.

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  6. Suzz,
    That was room and board in COLLINS for a year. They've upped tuition to a ballpark of $20,000 a year flat fee for undergrads now. I missed the biggest hikes. I've covered all the bad words I know.

    The loan lady I talked to today was a T-total bitch and basically told me it was my responsibility to get ahold of them to tell them I wasn't in school anymore and for them to charge me. HOW??? When I didn't have the info from either of my universities. Fuckers. I'm going to the financial aid office later this week, and I only hope they know their ass from a pocketwatch and can help me out somehow.

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  7. I guess now would be a bad time to ask you for some money?

    Just trying to make you laugh, kid.

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  8. I've got a new shiny quarter with your name all over it!

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  9. Should we start up a PayPal account for you and solicit donations?

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    ReplyDelete
  11. Os,
    Don't joke about that. You'll likely see an outstretched hand icon here soon. lol

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  12. Andi, I seriously wanted to puke when I read this entry. I'm a student loan baby, too -- paid for most of it, but two years were courtesy the Canadian gubment and they're fucking me for 20k.

    I'm sorry, so sorry.

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  13. Andi, you didn't cover all the words. Let me help you: Jesus fuck and stunned cunt.

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  14. Dena,
    We can start the 20k club...just as high and not as much fun.

    Damn, Jesus fuck and stunned cunt are two of my favorites, too. Thank you for reminding me.

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  15. Holy shite thats a lot of money. Stories like this make me glad I live in ireland and got free thrid level education.

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  16. Oh Andi. I am so shocked and appauled I don't know what to say. I feel sick for you! I'd give you the shirt off my back if I could. Thank God I don't have any students loans to go with the 2 car and 1 house ones I do have. Yikes. Not to mention the beautiful hospital bill I am sure is in the mail.

    I'm with Os. Start a Full-Nekid Thursday site and take submissions with a substantial licensing fee. You'll have it paid off in no time!

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  17. it might be a good idea to fake your own death and pay the loans off with the life assurance

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  18. AMEN!!! I went to a private women's college that costs roughly 23,000 a year. I got academic scholarships and poor folks' grants and my tuition was free. HOWEVER, in Georgia, a single mom cannot get any welfare aid if she is in a University (tech school you get aid). They told me that I would have to work 40 hours in addition to school and work study to get help. So I took out loans to cover rent and daycare. Now I am 18,000 in debt and my loan payments take an ENTIRE WEEKS PAY!

    I feel ya, sista!

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  19. God, I wish I owned one of these university thingies.

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  20. what the heck? how is that even possible? if you are ever wandering as a poor homeless vagrant because of this and hit chattanooga i will let you use my shower one night.

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  21. Fence,
    Maybe I should move to Ireland!!!

    Heather,
    I keep trying to think of something to cash in on. My mom and I invented toe rings, but we missed out on gettin' 'em on the market. Now maybe I can do puppy porn? lol

    AMS,
    Hot damn, I think you may have something there!

    Amanda,
    *high five* to my debt sista! It's good to be among good people.

    Johnny,
    If you ever buy one...I'm there. But you must give me a tutition break for HNT.

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  22. Clack,
    You're too kind. Will you refill my can of pork-n-beans, too?

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  23. Faking your death might work at that. Go underground I say. We'll feed your book and Pork n Beans addictions!

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  24. Amber,
    You just won be over with the offer of books!

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  25. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  26. What a mess!!!!!

    My sister went to TCU for undergrad and SMU for her law degree so her consolidated payments are more than the mortgage on my big fancy house..... I cannot even imagine how oppressive that much debt must be.

    You know strippers make a lot of money.... let's see if we can't get together and pay that debt off!! :)

    *kisses*

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  27. Damn!!

    That sucks. I hope you make bucket loads of money in future years and you can laugh it off. Fuck 'em

    If you was a football or basketball player you'd get paid for.. yes/no?

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  28. kind of demanding for a beggar, aren't you? ;) just kidding. you can have all the pork and beans i own. if you're lucky i'll throw a couple extra cans in your cart as you roll it by....

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  29. I think the showercam idea needs to be revisited, as well.

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  30. Steph,
    I already have the shoes for stripping. Just gimme a pole.

    Os,
    I'm the camerawoman, so it's fine with me.

    BigD,
    If I had been a male basketball player at Baylor I would've made a hefty salary and had a nice locker room to sleep in if need be. As it is now, I'm a short stocky girl with decent golf skills and a wicked jump shot...and still gonna be payin' loans til I expire.

    Clack,
    D. inspired me with a story about a homeless man in Waco with a tricyle with an HEB cart roped to it. I could motor around on that and pick up pork and beans from a number of donors, I'm sure. I might even find a morsel or two in the Jack in the Box dumpster.

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  31. For living in COLLINS???? WTF, Andi! *I* lived in Collins my Freshman year. No one liked it. It is not a nice dorm.

    $20,000 flat tuition. That is positively ridiculous! And I say that having worked for two colleges that charged more than that ... and that was years ago.

    [taking a deep breath]... best I don't get started on this topic on your blog :)))))

    How can they not know you aren't in school? Don't they run reports of registered students against whatever financial aid reports they have? And then do edits? This isn't effing rocket science.

    God .. this sounds like every imbecilic university procedure I ever had to deal with when I was WORKING for them.

    I hope you are able to get some help, Andi. Universities screwing students over is a hot button with me.

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  32. Have you thought about something like a credit counceling service... they are free and often sucessfully negotiate away most of the interest and often get them to lower the payment for you. It worked recently for my daughters student loans (private college, super spendy).

    I ducked out for about 20 years... but now there are "find anyone" high speed internet, no privacy BS- and they finally caught up with me... now I work in an unrelated field though, and got my payments down to around $70 a month.

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  33. Oh my dear lord! I was only going to comment on the great picture, since no one had done that, but then I read that you're a golfer!?!?! With decent skills?? If there was any question before, it's gone now--I am so totally in love with you!!! And not just in that creepy old man way, either!! I had no idea!!

    BTW--I like the great picture, too...

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  34. Suzz,
    That was my question..how can they NOT KNOW? SallieMae and the US gubment didn't have a hard time finding out!

    Addict,
    Thank you for the suggestion. I have a list of questions that I'm going to get covered and talk to my accountant (my best friend's uncle!) and financial aid at my uni. and get going on some things.

    Os,
    I haven't played in a longggg time, and I would surely come away with disgusting blisters and a bad attitude, but I do play golf. Liked it so much I took it for two semesters in college, thankyouverymuch.

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  35. I meant to say that was a great picture too, but 1) I was too shocked by the number 27,000 once I realized it meant dollars and 2) Os beat me too it.

    But yeah, great picture. Did you do it yourself?

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  36. LOL, Heather. I know what ya mean...I'm going to have to post something else and move this one down the page so I don't gag every time I see it. lol

    I didn't do the pic. It is the fruit of Google's loins.

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  37. Fuck Higher learning. I am doing it now and I can't wait to see the damage done. Atleast here in Canada the costs aren't as excessive but still I intend on being bent over.

    I'm sorry to hear about your situation, I wish there was a way to help you out.

    Only piece of advice I ever like giving out...Don't worry, a solution will present itself. I know it doesn't mean much now, but you'll see.

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  38. R.,
    Thanks, deary. I'm actually not as freaked out about it as I think I should be. I'm more pissed that it wasn't brought to my attention two years ago so I could've avoided some of the interest pile-up. I knew going to a private school was going to rape me, and it was one of the best things I've done. I got some great experiences and some wonderful people came out of the deal.

    If I have to pay for the rest of my life...I'll just do it.

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    ReplyDelete
  40. You know, if you want to teach... there are programs out there where you can teach in a poor district for XX amount of years and get certain types of federal loans FORGIVEN. As in gone. Bye bye. No more money owed.

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  41. Andi, I gotta know where you found that picture.

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  42. Sam,
    I know. I taught high school for one year, have no education degree, and now teach in a community college. No desire to go back to high school teaching. I know, how can I say I don't wanna when I have this much loan money dangling over my head? I HATED it. Hate with a bloody fiery passion that left me with 12-day tension headaches and landed me on Zoloft.

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  43. NonGF,
    Goooogle image search, and for the life of me I can't remember what words I searched.

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  44. Andi, great to hear about your golf skills. I do hope everything works out alright for you. Money causes so much stress for those who have it and definitely those who don't.

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  45. Thanks, Dipper. I'm sure it'll work out. :)

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  46. i never went to university, but i know it costs a shit load of money.i know i don't agree with how much it costs whether i have gone or not. i hear adam screaming about it at times and not much makes him yell at all let alone yell LOUD. i would let him read this post but he would start yelling.

    that fucking sucks!!!! he is also running from school debt..join the club.

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