I Can Instantly Tell Whether Someone is African-American with My Amazing "Blackdar"
Children of Divorce Twice as Likely to Write Bad Poetry
Chicken Killed
Depression Hits Losers Hardest
Tenth Circle Added to Rapidly Growing Hell
CNN Still Releasing News Piled Up During Elian Gonzalez Saga
Sudanese 14-Year-Old Has Midlife Crisis
Gay Gene Isolated, Ostracized
South Postpones Rising Again for Yet Another Year
And my very very very favorite that made me cackle and disturb everyone in the library:
Dolphins Evolve Opposable Thumbs: "Oh, Shit," Says Humanity
Their headline after 9/11 was HOLY FUCKING SHIT!
ReplyDeleteI'd like to write for them, but don't really know how to achieve that goal.
The Onion is the best. And it is so sexy that you cackle.
ReplyDeleteah, for the onion. they're hilarious.
ReplyDeleteLMAO, Todd. I definitely think you should investigate writing for them. It would be a match made in the fluffy angel crotch of heaven.
ReplyDeleteKalani,
Girl I cackle with the best of 'em. Snort occasionally, too.
Clack,
I thought you'd like that. I had you in mind for this post.
todd I think you have found your calling!! Make it happen!
ReplyDeleteI've never read The Onion. I've heard of it, though.
ReplyDeleteThis is great stuff. Is it a paper? A magazine?
i wish the library had porn.
ReplyDeletei would go all the time.
I had onions on my burger a couple of days ago. I gave the gift of onion to everyone I met for the rest of the day!
ReplyDeletelove onions! just got around to reading your blog and following some of the links. very nice.
ReplyDeleteSuzz,
ReplyDeleteIt's an online "news" site that spoofs everything. So very very funny.
http://www.theonion.com
Enjoy the hours of twisted goodness!
Johnny,
ReplyDeleteYou're not alone. Many of your minions would agree wholeheartedly.
LOL, Os...
I'm sure they were very...grateful isn't the word.
Thanks, Art! I hope you'll come back!
They killed a chicken?
ReplyDeleteI read that twice...I love the Onion!
Andi,
ReplyDeleteThanks! Had no idea it was an online thingy.
NonGF,
ReplyDeleteUnimaginable isn't it?? I need to get finished with this Onion book before it's due back. So funny.
Suzz,
You're welcome! Enjoy!
The Onion is fresh and never uptight with their columns.
ReplyDeleteRuben,
ReplyDeleteYou're exactly right...they are the freshest of the fresh. And don't you agree that our lovely VegASS would make a great Onion writer?
LOVE the Onion!
ReplyDeleteThose are fabulous. My all-time favorite is still:
ReplyDeleteClinton Dispatches Vowels to Bosnia!
LOL, C! Love that one. I missed it somehow. :o)
ReplyDeleteOMG! Did you see the one today?
ReplyDeleteRumsfeld Makes Surprise Visit to Wife's Vagina
LMAO! I didn't see it! I must visit right now!
ReplyDelete