Monday, April 03, 2006

Venomous Vixen

It is an unmistakably Kat Auster morning. I've officially begun to gauge the day by what rock star I feel like emulating. Another weird habit to add to the list.

I'm still venomous this morning. I fucking hate everything. I blame this on a chemical imbalance. It's days like this that I miss the dark, sweet teat of Zoloft.

On the way to work I found myself calling multiple people in traffic "cuntfaces." Ladylike, eh?? Not gonna lose any sleep over it.

I'm now sitting at work, listening to Ani DiFranco because I can do that at work, and it's days like these that I thank Jehovah (God) for that. Tomorrow I'm bringing my digital camera to work so I can show you all a picture of our newly constructed altar to Yoda. We have a Yoda. They decided he needed an altar. Who am I to disagree? Yoda is one of the few deities I could get behind.

My whining is even uninteresting to me. I had a whole post worked out on the way to work. I must've left it in the car.


  1. Ahhhhhh Zoloft induced days are infinitely more boring, Andi! LOL Though it did help me sleep, it left me feeling like an unemotional twat the rest of the time. I prefer feeling my emotions and trying my best to work them out. Though, if I go overboard again, I'll probably go back on it.

    And you're allowed to call anyone a cuntface in your car. It's your car. Cuss accordingly! ;)

    Can't wait for the Yoda altar! Interesting, yes, those pictures will be.

  2. Vix,
    I used to take a whopping 25-50mgs of Zoloft a day and it didn't leave me feeling comatose...just happy. Quicky to laugh, not so quick to break anyone's neck.

    I curse like a pro. There should be an Olympic event for it.

  3. We should all worship at the alter of JeYoda, provided it is original SW variety, and not prequel-dude :)

  4. oooooo an Olympic Cussing Event! I think we should start that ourselves! LOL

  5. Fence, he's definitely original SW! He was here in the lab way before the new stuff came out. Now he's decked out with bamboo, incense, and even a zen sand garden. Yoda is swanky.

    Vixen, I'm game!!!

    Os, of course he is. Lift his little tunic and you get an eye full.

  6. awww, poor Andi - I hate days like these and especially monday's! I hope you feel better later. Go home, take a hot shower and drink some wine. That might make it better...or worse, who knows?

  7. Funkster,
    My bad mood has mellowed a bit. I don't hate my hair and my ass and stupid drivers quite as much as I did this morning. Although, wine could still be a good thing.

    No, no not if I'm going to read the most boring book known to man.

  8. I work out posts in my car, too. Lose most of them. Lost my digital recorder, so that sucks as well.

    Cuntface - excellent word.

    Don't ask me about the time my dad asked me how to spell the C word. It was hilarious. But my mom wasn't too happy.

  9. NonGF,
    I have a digital recorder but I keep forgetting to put it in my car. Lotta good that does me.

    Explaining the C-word to your dad...can only imagine that would turn out badly. I hope your mom wasn't near the kitchen knives.

  10. Shitbird is the best word to use when driving around jackasses. I've found it to be quite relaxing and empowering.

  11. I love my chemical imbalances. My mood swings make me a mystery boy.

  12. J,
    I like cuntfaces actually. It's even edgier than shitbird. Right now I'm letting it all wash away as I listen to Willie Nelson and Pat Green.

    That you are. I call you mystery boy all the time in casual conversation. Do you wear all black and paint your nails? That would up the mystery factor at least half a mystery-point.

  13. ah, ani at work. is there any higher form of zen?

  14. Brian, there is decidedly no higher form of zen! I've checked all the zen handbooks and it's official.

    Except maybe 2 Live Crew at work. Haven't tried that.


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