Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Regarding Lurchers and Match.com

I've been talking to Sports Guy on the phone a bit, and he's lurchy...just as I thought. For those of you who might not be familiar with the term "lurcher" it refers to one who hangs on so tight you find claw marks in your arm, shoulder, or even ass depending on how big a pain they are.

Sports Guy is a lurcher. He tries to play it off, but he's a lurcher. And on top of that, I think I may have met my match in the sexual innuendo department. He's got lines I've never dreamed of (and that's not necessarily a good thing seeing as I like to be the perv in my relationships...both friendly and otherwise).

Anywho, we talked Monday night for a bit, but he was on his way to a late softball game so we had to cut things short. He asked if he could call back later even though it would be pretty late, to which I replied in the affirmative. I'm a night owl!!! But what I failed to calculate was how early I'd arisen that morning, how much work I'd done during the course of the day, and how effin' tired I was. SO, around 10:30 I turned the ringer off and went to sleep.

Sure enough he called around 11, and I had an e-mail the next morning berating me in baby talk for having fallen asleep. So, being the nice person I am, and not wanting to believe that he could be such a fucking pain, I e-mailed him, explained that I'm cramming for my Masters exam and was wiped out, etc. Again, a condescending e-mail in return ("yadda yadda yadda, just call me later today when you free up"). SO, I called him last night, talked to him for a bit. At one point he mentioned that it's his b-day today (Wednesday) and he wished I could come to Dallas and "blow out his candle."
Ewww.

But the real kicker, right before I said, "Oh, God, look at the time. Gotta go," was when he said, "Well, hopefully we can talk tomorrow night. Maybe we can spontaneously combust."

No thanks, fucker. I'm a solitary combuster. The next thing you know he'll be sending me pictures of his speckled wang.

On a happier note: DG is enchanting. As is Barrister. And I got an e-mail from a film/tv/radio major at a local uni yesterday. Seems like an interesting guy, so I'll drop him a line today.


Edit: Both of the t-shirts below are on the way!!!



Listening: "New Slang"...The Shins

16 comments:

  1. Oh, wow. Sports Guy sounds like a real ass!

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  2. Bingo! Gives me the heebie-jeebies.

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  3. Yikes. Sports Guy sounds like a nut. Better cut him loose.

    Can't wait to hear more about DG and the Barrister. Hmm...sounds like a bad sitcom. lol :)

    House was excellent last night. Hurry up and get caught up!

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  4. Heatherina, must fill you in further on DG and Barrister. Very interesting men--and snarky. And cute if their pictures are really them and not a neighbor or something.

    Thesis Director was just in here asking if I watched House last night. I've got her hooked!!!

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  5. I want a Barrister. Send him my way when you are done.... :)

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  6. lol how funny... this is why some men are so sad.

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  7. This is off-topic, Andi, but have you seen the page with Hugh Laurie's pic and quotes in In Style mag? I tore mine out and framed it (see pic at my blog).

    Your adventures in the dating world make my head spin. I think I'm kind of relieved that I married young. Is it me, or are guys these days getting . . . kinda girly?

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  8. spontaneously combust?

    oh for fuck sake. I think i might have to pay for a month of your match.com subscription for the entertainment Im getting out of this!

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  9. Nancy, that Hugh pic is yummy! Soooo handsome!

    And as for guys. Many are getting quite girly--lurchy and oversensitive. I think it's the whole metrosexual movement. Blahh. I like balance somewhere between a he-man and a drama queen. There's gotta be that balance somewhere!

    LOL, AMS! Glad you're enjoying it. It's spontaneously horrifying and hilarious at times.

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  10. Something about that emo-tion picture reminds me of Jared Leto. Why is that?

    I'm so glad I don't have to worry about dating anymore.

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  11. LOL, me too, Heather. He's very emo I suppose. :)The smiley just needs more eyeliner.

    And dating blows. If I'm being honest, I just like playing puppetmaster on Match.com at times. *evil laugh* But surprisingly, some of these fellas actually seem pretty cool...and normal.

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  12. Oh, yeah, I forgot about that metrosexual thing. I might as well live in a cave.

    Sorry if it takes forever for your comment to show. This comment moderation thing is kind of hinky but I figured with "Hugh Laurie" in the text it might get nutty, he's such a dreamboat. LOL

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  13. He sounds like a badly written character.

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  14. Good lord, spontaneous combustion freaks me out.

    He sounds like a nice guy. I could go fishin' with him.

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  15. *LMAO* Spontaneously combust?? Yep, I agree with Heather. Better cut this guy loose...

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