Friday, September 26, 2008

Shortest Sob Story Ever (Coarse Language Ahead)

I'm exhausted--mentally and physically--and just a wee tad full of wine. Sooo, you all get the very abbreviated version of a very infuriating story. It seems my day went from bad to inexplicably horrendous.

The friend I wrote about in my last Bibliobuffet column (J.)...the one that's so special to me and with whom I share boatloads of interests....that I've known since college and that was planning a trip out here in October? That one. He's married. MARRIED. Not sure how one overlooks sharing that fact. Given, I didn't talk to him for almost a year and a half while I was in NC, but you'd think he might've mentioned it since we began talking again in July.

I sent the copy of Animal, Vegetable, Miracle I discussed in my article, and it was returned to me as "undeliverable" for that particular address. There were red flags before that, but I hadn't done much investigation. 30 minutes of Internet research later I discovered that it was a fake address, and I had his real address--listed with his and wife's name. I also had his home phone number (already had cell) her blog and MySpace addresses, and one hell of a bad attitude. Oh, and pictures of them together. Why not?

He and I were friends back when they were dating, and he told me they broke things off a couple of years ago. I have no idea if that was true at all. They might have broken and up and gotten back together in my absence. It really doesn't matter in the least. It was a 9-year friendship and now it's over in 30 minutes. Who knows what was really real and what was bullshit.

The moral of this story: don't fuck with a librarian. We are unbelievably talented with technology.

I feel sorry for his wife. She probably thinks he's a stand-up guy.


  1. What a scumbag. Don't worry; what goes around, comes around. He'll get his eventually. Feel bad for the wife, tho.

  2. Certainly not as good a friend as you thought.

  3. Oh, Andi, I'm so sorry. You're too good for someone like that, even just as a friend.


  4. Oh, that sucks. I don't understand why someone just isn't up front with that sort of thing online. Maybe not publicly, but at least once an email or two has been traded. A majority of us aren't looking for a spouse, or even a date, with anyone here--why would marital status be something to hide?

  5. sounds like Ex-boyfriend. The one I dumped last year. We had been dating for THREE years when I found out he had a wife. Stupid me took him back after he left said wife and wasted another 3.5 years with his cheating, lying ass. You can do soooooooooo much better! What a douchebag.

    I agree, let's get drunk.

  6. Amen, Tammy.

    Stu, so true.

    Lezlie, amen to that too.

    Os, yeah, since this was a 9 year friendship and we were hardly ever single at the same time, you would think he might mention it. Whatever.

    Geez, I hate that for you, Amanda. It does make me feel slightly less retarded that this has happened to else I know who is smart and normal. You can't ever tell about people, eh?

  7. How deceitful! I'm not surprised you feel betrayed and angry, and I'm sorry that happened to you.

  8. EEP!! He needs a good ass kicking!

  9. Oh, Andikins, I'm so sorry. But, I'm rather impressed with your librarian research skills. You go, girl! Now, forget him and move on. You're too good to be friends with a loser like him.

  10. What a jerk.
    Now you're learning the true power of librarianship...

  11. I will never understand people like that. I'm sorry, Andi. I feel bad for his wife too. She probably has no clue what a schmuck she is married to.

  12. Wow. Just wow. Seriously, I don't even know what to say. Who does that kind of thing?!

    Andi, so sorry about this girlfriend.

  13. O wow. Wow. Some people. Yeah, I think this deserves a nice treat of a good bottle of wine.

  14. Ooh Andi! I'm so sorry you had to find that out and that way, what an ass! You deserve better.....glad you had a good girly day with your mom. My mama always makes me feel better :)

  15. As someone who's been the wife in this situation (though we weren't married) let me tell you, it sucks. And as someone who's been on your side of this situation, it sucks. guys suck. #&@^%R(!!$%$@

    you'll do much better.

  16. Thanks, Becca! I need the hugs! :)

    Oh, Chris, a woman after my own heart. I couldn't have said it better myself.

    LOL, Nancy! My librarian research skills sort of impressed me, too! I've found poop on idiots before online, but this was a whole mountain of poop.

    Amen, Mel! I think I'm ready for my cape and secret decoder ring any time.

    Wendy, I don't get it either. I could never do something like that to someone.

    Iliana, that was sort of my reaction. Like who REALLY DOES THAT. What a cliche he is.

    Amanda, a good bottle of wine for me and a flaming bag of crap on his doorstep. lol

    Kristina, moms are great for that aren't they? Mine had to deal with quite a bit of bitchiness and short-temperedness yesterday, but she took it all in stride like a champ.

    They do suck, Melanie. No doubt about it. It's just a shame, what could've remained a viable friendship is over because he lied about something so stupid! I wouldn't hate his guts if he'd just told me. Oh well. Good riddance. He deserves a good swift kick in the crotch--from his wife and myself.

  17. Hmmmmmm??? Hi I am Madeleine, I just read your post.
    I was the wife of such a guy and yes I thought he was a stand-up guy, the best! Eat your heart out girls, I have the real deal, honest, faithful, you name it. If you go on my blog and scroll down you'll see how lucky you are to have found out what a scumbag some guys can be (I still believe there are good man out there, kind of...). I'll be in court soon, in the meanwhile I live on anxiety and discust. Luckly I have my little stand-up guy, my Jack Russell Oliver who "NEVER" lets me down and loves me with his big heart and so do I love him with my heart. It's me and him against this moron I have to look at in court while he lies and lies....

    Thanks to Nat, Wendy and Ana I am out of the funk, if you read this girls, thank-you so much. Smootch!

    Have a nice week Andi and I am sorry to introduce myself in such a rude manner, your post just helped me understand I am not alone.

  18. Thanks for introducing yourself, Madeleine! It's good to not feel alone in something like this because it can be so very disappointing, infuriating, and unbelievable.

  19. The internet gives us the opportunity to be a different person,doesn't it? Sometimes we get to be funnier than we are in person, or more audacious, and sometimes we get to be more single.

    People suck sometimes.

  20. Yep, and some of us just are who we are every day. Normal folks who get royally fucked over by the ones who want to be something they're not. Nights like these I would love to try my damndest to make his life miserable. But I won't, not tonight, because I'm not a shitty person. Blah.

  21. Yikes. At least you dodged a bullet.

  22. Argh, I'm so sorry, Andi. Nothing hurts more than being deceived by someone you thought you could trust :/

  23. That is absolutely terrible! But your conclusion about not fucking with librarians made me smile. It makes me wish I was a librarian in fact. :)

  24. Sho' nuff, Nik.

    You are correct, Nymeth. Luckily for me I have too much going on to stop and think about it much. By the time I do I won't want to waste the time. lol

    LOL, LH! I try to look at the bright side, what can I say? And maybe I should start a PI business in my spare time!

  25. He's an ASS. Consider yourself lucky.

    I'm sorry you're hurting.


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