Estella's Revenge, Issue #2

The May issue of Estella's Revenge is up and running! This month's issue has a "sensuality" theme. Let me know what ya think!

Click the picture to check it out.

Listening: "Paint it Black"...The Rolling Stones

Sex dream #17

I keep tabs on my sex dreams because they're pretty rare. If we take a moment to do math, I'm 25 and I've had 17 sex dreams. I don't think I actually started keeping count until I was 17 or so, so really, they've been all squashed together, but I don't think I've had many in comparison to others. Then again, maybe the others are just lying to me.

But anyway, I'm not going to give details because I'm not a total blog skank. However, I will tell you that this was a wonderful dream on two levels.

1. It was partially about Jake Gyllenhaal. Apparently my Hugh Laurie crush has overtaken and the Jake part of my subconscious wants some attention, too. In the dream Jake and I fell in love. Hard. But, you know what I did? I cheated on Jake. I cheated on Jake with a real-life friend (shout out to Jeff! This will make him indescribably happy). Jake was crushed and he cried.

2. The sex part was awesome!

That is all.

Misanthropy, cultural whoredom, and slothful bliss...

I always know when my blog stats take a huge hit, I'm being fucking boring and/or not posting enough. Readers are a finicky lot. Actually, without looking at my blog stats, I still know I'm being boring and not posting enough. It's a sad day when I say....

I have writer's block.

I do. It's tragic. I've had immeasurable trouble settling in to write school papers, to blog, AND even trouble writing my pieces for the upcoming issue of the 'zine. I'm hoping the problems will assuage slightly today as I'm feeling very fluttery and artistic. And it's cloudy outside which, oddly enough, helps. I hate sunlight. I think I'm 1/8th vampire. That would explain the archy eyebrows and penchant for black, white, and red.

I have another confession:

I haven't sat down to read a book in probably a month. I've slogged through parts of readings for classes and such, but my vigor for reading has been down the shitter. It's a concentration issue. However, even though I'm not reading, I'm still having a mad urge to order Siri Hustvedt's book of essays from Scamazon. OH, and Hugh Laurie's first novel, The Gun-Seller...because if he can act, write, row, and play music, I shall hunt him down and rape him. Like I don't have enough books as is. Check out this link to see my books.

I'm starting to feel the itch to read again, and here's a short list of the books I'm aching for:

Close Range: Wyoming Stories (Annie Proulx)...which I started a zillion months ago.
The Amber Spyglass (Philip Pullman)...also started and is undoubtedly wonderful. WONDERFUL!
The Human Stain (Philip Roth)..also started. Promises to intrigue.
The Position (Meg Wolitzer)...Heather liked and sent, which means I'll adore it.
...and a stack of graphic novels. Maybe I should start with those. Easily chewable pieces of literary goodness.

And I'm having a music craving, too. Elise and I went looking for Dave Matthews' solo album, Some Devil yesterday. Circuit City continues to be worthless--I'm sure many of you remember the laptop/restocking fee scandal from summer.

I hate the end of the semester. It's an emotional vomit stew.

Listening: "Collide"...Howie Day

Crock of shit?...Anyone? Anyone?

I went to do my degree plan today since I'm starting thesis hours and shit in the fall. Had to fill out some stuff, talk to The Man about the master's exam, etc. I took my thesis advisor because this is the first thesis she's directed--we both need the info. So, we're sitting, we're chatting with The Man and get the paperwork done, he gives me some copies of red tapey shit, blah blah. So we get to the part where he asks what my plans are after graduating. I tell him I'm applying to Ill State, U of Florida, yadda blah blah. I make sure to throw in that I need to go AWAY to a bigger university in order to be able to teach at a shit-sized one like the one I attend. He knows this. He's The Man for Jehovah's sake. So after I finish telling him where I want to go he.....get ready....slumps back in his chair, hands crossed across old man belly and ROLLS HIS EYES. Why? Because he can be a selfish old shit and wants everyone to stay at our shit stain to help boost the grad programs.

THEN, he goes on to get two solid digs in on children's/adolescent literature (my field) because he's old school and thinks it's not a real field.

Awesome. Fabulous. I love academic politicking.

Damn The Man.